Greets Every Dog. Ignores Every Human. Dog Hoodie — Funny Dog Walk Pullover
- Free worldwide delivery
- Printed just for you
- Cosy dog hoodie
Greets Every Dog. Ignores Every Human. · 5 colours · XS–3XL
Every dog is a long-lost friend. Every human is background noise.
A cosy fleece hoodie with a bold illustrated back print — see the photos for the full design. For the dog who will cross the whole park to say hello to another dog, and barely notices the humans on the other end of the lead. Full attention for every dog, polite indifference for every person.
Eye-catching print, built to last
Printed big and bold across the back — vivid, high-contrast artwork that holds up wash after wash. See the photos for the full design.
A gift that gets a smile
Every dog owner knows this dog: the one who spots another dog from a hundred metres away and needs to say hello right now, while the people at the other end of the leads are treated like scenery. Handshakes and small talk can wait. A funny tribute to the dog whose entire social life is canine.
Cosy fleece, thoughtful details
A 7.4oz/yd² 60/40 combed ringspun cotton-poly fleece with a soft feel throughout. A collar hole at the back of the hood keeps the collar or harness accessible without taking the hoodie off, plus a handy front pocket and ribbed cuffs and hem for a snug, secure fit. Available in Black, Navy, Granite Heather, Mauvelous and Saltwater — the design prints crisp and true on every colour.
| Size | Weight | Chest | Back length | Typical breeds |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| XS | 0–4 lb | 12.5" (32cm) | 8.5" (22cm) | Chihuahua, teacup Yorkie, teacup Pomeranian (puppies) |
| S | 5–10 lb | 13.5" (34cm) | 9.4" (24cm) | Chihuahua, Yorkshire Terrier, Pomeranian, Toy Poodle |
| M | 11–23 lb | 14.5" (37cm) | 10" (25cm) | Dachshund, French Bulldog, Pug, Cavalier King Charles Spaniel |
| L | 24–45 lb | 16.5" (42cm) | 12" (30cm) | Cocker Spaniel, Beagle, Border Collie, Staffordshire Bull Terrier |
| XL | 46–70 lb | 18.5" (47cm) | 15.5" (39cm) | Labrador Retriever, Golden Retriever, Boxer, Husky |
| 2XL | 71–85 lb | 23" (58cm) | 17.5" (44cm) | German Shepherd, Doberman, large Golden Retriever |
| 3XL | 86 lb+ | 28" (71cm) | 18" (46cm) | Great Dane, Mastiff, St Bernard, Newfoundland |
Measurements are from the hoodie manufacturer's own spec sheet for this model. Breed examples are a general guide only — always go by your dog's actual weight, and for barrel-chested breeds (French Bulldogs, Pugs, Staffies) size up from the weight range.
Pairs well with
Sniff Inspection, Full Stop At Every Lamppost, Not Lost. Just Thorough., Leash Laws Are More Of A Suggestion, Every Walk Is A Negotiation & Professional Pace Setter — more honest, funny badges for the dog who takes every walk very seriously. Shop Sniff Inspection → · Shop Full Stop → · Shop Not Lost → · Shop Leash Laws → · Shop Every Walk → · Shop Pace Setter →
The rest of the range — more designs, one for every kind of pet person. Shop all dog hoodies →
Questions & answers
How big is the design on the back?
It's placed centre-back and sized to sit clearly within the print area without crowding the seams — bold and easy to read rather than a small logo. The product photos show the exact scale, so have a look before ordering.
What size should I order?
Sizing is based on your dog's weight, not breed alone. Check the weight range in the size guide above, and for barrel-chested breeds (French Bulldogs, Pugs, Staffies) size up from the weight range.
What colours does it come in?
Five colourways: Black, Navy, Granite Heather, Mauvelous and Saltwater. The Greets Every Dog design prints the same bold way on every colour.
Who's this hoodie for?
For the dog who has never met another dog they didn't want to greet, or a stranger they couldn't stroll straight past. A funny gift for anyone whose dog is the friendliest one at the park, as long as you have four legs.
How do I wash it so the print lasts?
Machine wash on the warm cycle with detergent. Turning it inside out before washing helps keep the print looking sharp for longer.
How long does delivery take?
Each hoodie is made to order, so please allow 2–5 working days for printing before dispatch. Delivery is free and fully tracked to the UK, EU, US, Australia and more than 40 countries in total. Anywhere else ships at a flat £6.99. For an estimated delivery time to your location, see our contact page or check the information at checkout.
Can I return it if it's not right?
If you're not happy with your order, visit our contact page and we'll sort it out. Returns are free within 30 days for unused items in original condition. As each hoodie is printed to order, we can't accept change-of-mind returns on worn items, but anything faulty will be reprinted or refunded.
Part of the SniffWaggleNWalk™ range — designed in-house, printed on demand, built for real walks.
Designed for dog people, built for warmth
Our designs are created in-house for proud dog parents and printed on demand using long-lasting inks. Made to order means less waste and a hoodie made just for your dog.